We have been investigating, experimenting, and trying to crack the secret code of love. Many of us seem to have forgotten that free love was a rarity at first. From aristocrats to slaves, marriages and relationships were often given as orders and choices of individuals with greater power and authority to obtain political, religious, material, and personal gains. Thus, there are the great love tragedies of “Romeo and Juliet” as well as countless others who have been carelessly pursued their innocent expression of love. These tragic love stories have left many of us wondering, why is it so difficult to love and what is it like to experience this depth of love?
Freedom In Love:
The love of free will has come a long way in the 21st century thanks to the evolution of human love experiences, technological progress, and cultural changes. In today’s most liberal societies, people have the freedom to choose and express their admiration and desire for the subjects of their affection with little or no consequence. However, in societies where we can freely choose who we want to love, we have seen an increase in the divorce rate, a decrease in the marriage rate, and more people who delay marriage for different reasons.
Components Of Love:
We experience the universal conditions of pleasure and pain, the union, and the definitive disintegration of love and relationships, no matter how little or how much we love. No matter how rich and powerful you are, you are always subject to the emotional and physical transgressions of others.
So, if we know the ultimate end of all love and relationship, why do we relentlessly seek love, either in the form of a committed relationship or by sleeping with as many people as possible? What do we pursue in our adolescence, 20 to 70, and until the moment of our death? And if we have to look back on our lives, we would regret the moments when we made no more effort, the people we hurt, and the most painful of all, we easily abandoned this person who awakens our soul, just to learn too late.
Pleasures and pains are the twin brothers of love. We cannot wait for one or the other. We believe that we deserve the love of God and it is the responsibility of another person to make us happy. If we want a divine love, then we have to do divine work. If we are not willing to open our hearts to experience judgments, disappointments, and pains in the experience of love, how can we ask for a love that brings us happiness? If we don’t want to overcome our ego and karmic conditioning, how can we show the love that gives us meaning? If we don’t want to heal the deepest wounds of our soul, how can we expect to live without pain?
Nature Of True Love:
Perhaps we can think of ourselves as individuals who have come together to help each other learn and master the experiences of love and separation in different ways: commitment, marriage, infidelity, rejection, betrayal, and abandonment. So, in the face of repetitive failures, disappointments, and injuries, we do not give up easily and continue searching, learning, and understanding the true nature of love. In doing so, we can look beyond the rise and fall of constant changes in our daily interactions and relationships.
Never Lose Hope:
We learn not to lose energy in trivial questions such as why he/she never answered my text message or never returned my call. We do not doubt our values because the person we love chooses another person and respect their choice and their will. We do not live the rest of our lives in disappointment and the pain of betrayal. We do not take the easy path of love at the expense of others.
When we transcend our experiences and our learning, love is no longer an idea of you, me, him, her, or us. To love is to free ourselves from our pains, our fears, our regrets, our shame, our guilt, and our illusions so that we can go beyond our limited perceptions of ourselves and of what is’ love.
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